What can you do to make visits with your ageing parent feel meaningful?
The most meaningful visits with ageing parents involve shared activities - not just sitting together. Simple creative projects, guided conversations, and hands-on engagement give you something to do side by side, which naturally sparks memories, laughter, and real connection. You don’t need to plan anything elaborate. You just need a reason to sit down together.
If you’re reading this, you probably already know the feeling. You drive over. You sit down. You ask how they’re going. They say fine. You check the fridge. You ask about the medication. And then… what?
The visit isn’t bad, exactly. It’s just, functional. And somewhere underneath it, there’s a quiet ache - a sense that you’re running out of time to really connect, and you’re not sure how.
Here are five practical things you can do to change that.
1. Bring something to do together - not just something to talk about
Shared activity reduces the pressure of face-to-face conversation and gives you a natural focus. When your hands are busy, conversation flows more easily. Creative activities like painting, drawing, or craft projects are especially effective because they engage both fine motor skills and memory.
2. Ask questions that unlock stories, not just updates
Open-ended questions about the past - childhood, career, travel, family traditions - spark richer conversation than status updates about health or meals. Conversation prompt cards designed for intergenerational use can guide this naturally.
“How are you?” gets you “Fine.” Every time.
Try instead: “What was your first job?” “What did Nan’s kitchen smell like?” “What’s a holiday you still think about?”
These questions reach past the surface and into the stories that make your parent who they are. You’ll hear things you’ve never heard before. And for parents with early memory challenges, long-term memories are often the strongest - these questions play to that strength.
Each Artful Connections kit includes 6 conversation cards designed by qualified art therapist Debra Shapiro specifically for this kind of intergenerational moment
3. Let go of the idea that you need to “fix” something every visit
Many adult children feel guilty if they’re not solving a problem during every visit - sorting medication, checking bills, booking appointments. Those things matter. But if every visit is a task list, the relationship slowly becomes transactional.
Give yourself permission to have one visit a week - or a fortnight - where you’re not there to fix anything. You’re just there to be together. That’s not wasted time. That’s the time that matters most.
4. Make it sensory, not just verbal
Seniors often respond strongly to sensory engagement - colour, texture, scent, music - even when verbal communication is difficult. Painting, handling art materials, or working with textured paper can stimulate cognitive function and emotional expression.
Art therapy research consistently shows that creative engagement activates parts of the brain that verbal conversation alone cannot reach. The feel of a paintbrush, the colour of paint on paper, even the smell of art materials - these are sensory experiences that can unlock emotions and memories.
You don’t need to be an art therapist to tap into this. A simple painting project with good materials and gentle guidance can do more for your parent’s mood than an hour of small talk.
5. Preserve what you create together
One of the most powerful things about a creative visit is that it produces something tangible. A painting. A page in a book. A memory recorded alongside a piece of art.
When your parent can see their artwork on the wall, or flip through a memory book of what you’ve made together, it extends the experience beyond the visit itself. It gives them something to show the next person who walks through the door. It says: I made this. We did this together.
What makes a good activity for visiting an elderly parent at home?
The best activities for visiting elderly parents are simple, guided, require no prior skill, and create a shared experience rather than a spectator dynamic. They should be low-mess, adaptable for limited mobility, and ideally produce something meaningful that outlasts the visit.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are good activities to do with ageing parents?
- Guided creative activities like painting, drawing, and craft projects are among the most effective because they combine fine motor engagement, sensory stimulation, memory recall, and social connection. Other good options include photo album reviewing, cooking together, gardening, and puzzle-building.
How do I connect with a parent who has dementia?
- Focus on sensory and creative activities rather than verbal conversation. Long-term memories are often preserved even when short-term recall fades, so activities that tap into familiar themes - gardens, coastal scenes, native flowers - can spark recognition and engagement.
Do I need art experience to use a creative kit with my parent?
- No. Therapist-designed kits like Artful Connections include guided templates, step-by-step video guidance, and all materials. They’re built so that anyone can sit down and create together regardless of skill level.
Can NDIS funding be used for creative activities at home?
- Yes, NDIS participants may be able to use their funding to purchase therapist-designed art kits where the support aligns with their plan and goals. Eligibility for NDIS funding is determined by your plan manager or support coordinator based on your individual goals and plan - not by Artful Connections.
